Two and two always makes a five

Michelle Featherstone - Coffee & Cigarettes

2010-08-02T23:37:00.000+08:00

I gave up coffee and cigarettes
I hate to say it hasn't helped me yet
I thought my problems would just dissipate
And all my pain would be in yesterday

I poured my booze all down the kitchen drain
And watched my bad habits get flushed away
I thought that that would keep my head on straight
And all my pain would be in yesterday

But it's true
I'm still blue
But I finally know what to do
I must quit
I must quit
You

I thought that if I didn't go and play
The sadness would get bored and go away
I thought that if I didn't go astray
Then all my pain would be in yesterday

But it's true
I'm still blue
But I finally know what to do
I must quit
I must quit
You

I sold my guitar and my piano
I thought that it was these that kept me low
I thought if only I could try and change
That all my pain would be in yesterday

But it's true
I'm still blue
But I finally know what to do
I must quit
I must quit
You

I must quit
I must quit
You

家

2010-07-20T21:53:00.001+08:00

I spoke to mum recently, she lost a friend whom she knew for almost 40 years, whom I knew since I was a kid. The sudden death shocked everyone. I didn't say anything to mum 'cause I could hear it in her voice that she was really sad. It just didn't make me feel good at all. I know exactly how it feels, I lost a good friend not too long ago, too. And I don't remember how much I cried, how many sleepless nights I went through. It just makes me want to go home and see my family right now. It's been a while. Dad just turned 71 four months ago, and I wasn't home. I'm just terribly sad that I haven't seen him for 6 months now. I just realised how much I miss them. Sometimes we take things for granted, especially our family. And we tend to forget that they are the most important people around. That's because they are always there to share, no matter you're happy or sad. I have been too selfish, not calling home enough for the last few years. But I'm glad I realised it now, before it gets too late. I'll be home soon :-)

Don't stop believing?

2010-06-20T23:55:00.000+08:00

I feel quite demoralised after hearing what happened to my friends' long distance relationships. Whatever happened to true love waits? Love does fail sometimes. In fact, most of the times for long distance relationships. I'm not trying to be drama here, I'm just worried. I really am. You can't be sure if the other party is still on the same page as you are when he is so far away. I want to be positive, I try to. I try not to freak out over small things, but I do. I suppose when you are in a relationship, there's no such thing as 'something small'. Every little thing means something. Like a text message, if you don't hear from the other party, at least a text message will do. I tend to freak out if I don't hear from him for the entire day. I need the attention, I really do. The attention that a girl would need when her boyfriend is so far away. I need that extra something to make me feel at ease, to make me believe that true love waits.

Gone

2010-05-11T21:17:00.000+08:00

After much struggling, you're finally gone. I was prepared for it, but it was still devastating to hear it. It was one of the hardest days in my life, ever. I wish I had a chance to say the last goodbye. I could have said goodbye three months ago, but I didn't. I waited, was hoping that you wouldn't be gone so soon. I waited, was hoping that there would be a miracle. I waited with optimism. At last I missed my chance to say the last goodbye to you. I could have been there, I could have held your hand through it, but I waited. I can't forgive myself, I shouldn't have waited. If only I could turn back time. I hope that you had a peaceful journey towards the end, and I hope that you'd forgive me. I'm sorry, I truly am. Rest in peace, friend. I miss you, and I always will.

Sinking Relationship

2010-05-09T02:05:00.000+08:00

When I look at her, I see myself. Tears flowing, her mind is somewhere else. It's been a long time coming. She has been waiting for this moment to come by, we all have. But things don't turn out the way she thought they would be. He got her hopes up but it's all fading away. She tries to reach out to him but he's already moving on. She tries to escape but she goes nowhere. She's waiting for the sunshine after the rain.

New year. New life.

2010-01-03T21:50:00.000+08:00

How time flies, another year has just gone by again. A lot of good things happened last year. I had a 8-month holiday which I'd done a bit of travelling so I can't really complain. And I met the best thing that's ever happened to me as well, so it's a bless! I must say it's been a great year, I'm truly contented :-)

And now, let's see what happens this year. I'm gonna be start studying again. That means I have to work hard, and save harder to pay the bills. 25k's ouch! I need to do more sports as well. More badminton sessions, fitter makes me happier! What else? Oh yeah, I plan to go to Europe for two weeks in May, phew something to look forward to. And I'm already counting down, mind you!

I've got a feeling that 2010 is gonna be an awesome year. Let's all be merry and optimistic! Happy New Year!

Trapped

2009-10-01T21:39:00.003+08:00

How often does an average person make the same mistake in their life? Once, twice, or countless times? Some learn from their mistakes, some apparently don't. And unfortunately, I myself fall into the latter category. Many a time, one struggles with oneself to resist falling for the same trap. The worst thing is you know it's a trap, and yet you still fall for it. It is almost irresistible. You're in a dilemma when it comes. Excited, because you know it's coming. But at the same time, anxiety strikes. Is it worth going through it over and over again? What do you get in the end? Some get stronger so I heard. And some never really get anything but the pain. One just tries getting used to it instead. They say good things take a while. But how long can you wait? And what if there's no future to begin with in the first place? Is is true when they say there's always sunshine after the rain?

Eight months later

2009-09-26T21:34:00.003+08:00

Finally started working again two weeks ago after a 8-month break. That was an insanely long break! Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining. I had a fabulous time, visited a couple of nice places, met some new people along the way. Now here I am again, back to work, back to reality. Looks like I'm gonna have to work extra hard for the coming years so that I am able to save up and travel more. I'm happy that I'm finally working again, though I'm still not used to getting up early. The new colleagues seem like an über hardworking bunch, too. I'm coping just okay. Wish me luck!

Bali

2009-08-13T14:55:00.020+08:00

I just got back from Bali two days ago and I'm already depressed. Post-holiday blues isn't easy to manage at all, is it? Once again, I'll let the pictures do the talking.

^ Handmade Batik that requires a lot of hard work and patience.

^ At Warung Babi Guling. A must-try local dish according to everyone who's ever been in Bali. I wasn't impressed though, it stank so bad I had a hard time swallowing it, yuck.

^ Kintamani Volcano, it's active by the way!

^ We were taken to this place where it grows coffee, cocoa and ginger trees.

^ The free coffee, ginger tea and hot chocolate tasting session afterwards. Sweeeeeet!

^ A Balinese woman washing her face with 'holy water'

^ The prayer.

^ Sarongs were given to those who were wearing shorts/miniskirts before entering temples.

^ At a shopping street outside of the temples where we got a lot of good bargains!
;-)

^ Balong & Keris Dance

^ Taman Ayun Temple

^ Ulu Danu Temple

^ Tanah Lot Temple

^ Sunset at Tanah Lot

^ Nusa Dua Beach. A great place for water sports.

^ Uluwatu Temple on a top of a cliff! Awesome view of Indian Ocean!

What a great place it is. I must say I have fallen in love with this place though I was only there for four days. I absolutely loved the breathtaking views of it, the spa as well as Balinese people, though I have to say I wasn't impressed with their food at all. All in all, it's still a nice place to visit. I would definitely go back many times in the future.

Over and done with

2009-07-29T14:10:00.007+08:00

I'm mentally exhausted as I write. Too many times, I'm being lied to. And too many times, you are being a hypocrite -- the other side of you which people have yet to discover. But why me? Why do I have to put up with all these nonsense of yours? I only wanted to be a friend. You know I hate it when people being two-faced, and yet you can never quit this. I used to trust in you, you were a friend then. But you lied, you lied way too many times. I tried. I really did try to regain the faith I lost in you, only to find that I was being lied to over and over again even though you said you'd change. I want to trust again, in people, in you. But I know I can't. Because I'm very sick and tired of all your two-faced truths. And I hate the fact that no one can see what I see in you. No one can see what you've done all these while, and they still think you're being so nice. Don't call me a loner, it's a way to protect self. Especially when being around hypocrites. At least a loner can pretend that nothing really matters when people turn their backs on her. Because no one deserves to know the truth, nor they give a damn about it anyway. But deep down inside of me, I know. I know that everything will be over and done with when this post is published. Perhaps there wasn't any friendship to begin with in the first place anyway, I have just been fooled.

There, and back again

2009-06-29T01:16:00.006+08:00

Her mind started to wander out of nowhere, back to where she was before. Why is she having second thought again even though everything seems to be perfect right now? Reason, unknown. Why is she even depressed when things are working well? Perhaps she just needs a moment to herself, listening to that inner voice, listening to staring elf. Was it just yesterday? Because she feels like it's been forever, everything seems so familiar, just like before. Things changed, but did they really? She's been there, yes she's been there a few times. There, and back again. How long more can she take before everything breaks down as before? Answer, unknown. Why is it still so hard? She should have experienced enough by now to get through all this, she should have cried enough to have the courage to carry on. But why is she still losing faith? Perhaps she is just mentally tired. The pain it brings, it never really heals. It always comes back to haunt her. Is she stronger than this? Only time will tell..

120 seconds of Empty Mind

2009-05-21T18:37:00.004+08:00

Lying on my bed staring blankly into the thin air, I can’t get to sleep again. I’m having trouble sleeping, and it’s getting to me pretty badly. Perhaps, just perhaps I need some sleeping pills. I can’t even remember when was the last time I got a good night’s sleep. It’s been forever. And I need one desperately. Getting lost in thoughts has always been my way of fighting insomnia, though it never really works. You just end up getting worse actually. Hence, some people prefer to get drunk. Though it’s never an ideal way to problem solving. But then again, I suppose no one knows exactly what’s an ideal way to problem solving. Too many times, we just try to escape. Escaping from reality, escaping from life to find an instant relief for our pain. There are too many lost souls out there. Perhaps that’s how alcohol gets in the way. But whether you like it or not, the truth is -- everyone needs to escape sometimes. I’m glad that alcohol is never my way of escaping. In fact, I don’t really like to go there, the state of mind where you’re hardly sane and everything just feels surreal. And the day after is just a killer. So you usually end up getting more depressed than ever. It doesn’t really help at all in the end. I prefer to stay sober, because I have my own way of escaping. I just empty my mind while listening to your guitar riffs, that 120 seconds of happiness gives me reassurance when I need it. And I don’t want to change.

Yesterday

2009-05-17T22:14:00.000+08:00

I browsed through the music on my computer today. I came across the music from an old friend that I haven’t heard from in years. How have you been all these years? I wonder. You left without even saying a proper goodbye. I went through a lot of sleepless nights wondering what went wrong but I still couldn’t work things out. I waited, you know I waited for a long time before I realised you were already gone. I had to give up in the end. It’s been three years since. Listening to your cover of that Marley song, all the memories of old times are coming back. It leaves me with a smile that’s been long gone. It was our song. You used to play guitar and I would sing you songs. Those were the good times that I’ve missed. You were someone else, I was still right there.

European Holiday Highlights Finale - Belgium & Spain

2009-04-24T15:36:00.029+08:00

I know it's been a while but here you go, the finale of my European Holiday Highlights. I only spent about 4 or 5 days in both places, such a shame. Would definitely go back again and hopefully staying longer the next time around.

^ A half-built Church in Mechelen. Plenty of funny stories behind it.

^ Central of Mechelen.

^ The most famous houses in Mechelen, a touristy site for Japanese & Koreans according to our Belgian friend Kristof!

^ An unidentified object in the street of Mechelen.

^ Biking around the Central of Mechelen.

^ A sexy biker with a bag full of bottled beers! What do you think we went to Belgium for?!

^ The 'frog view' of a Church in Antwerp.

^ And the 'frog view' continues..

^ The night view of the Old Harbour of Antwerp.

^ The Grand Palace in Brussels.

^ The mobile waffles car. The Belgians eat so much waffles that I got sick of them at some point!

^ The Belgian train, so efficient that it has to every other 5 minutes!

^ Monument in the Central of Brussels.

^ One of the best moments in Belgium! Need I say more?

^ The most expensive shopping place in Brussels.

^ The Central Square of Brussels.

^ The ever-famous "Manneken Pis"

^ The Atomium.

^ A restaurant we went in Little Brussels where we paid 5€ for that bottle of water!

^ Salsa!

^ The Spanish way of pouring!

^ San Sebastian

^ Everyone's out in the evening in San Sebastian.

^ Hondarribia

^ The Basque Country hat, a gift from JJ.

^ The cider house in Astigarraga

It was a great trip all in all. So long, Europe!

European Holiday Highlights 3 - Paris

2009-03-27T15:49:00.024+08:00

I didn't fall in love with Paris like everyone else did. But I had a good time none the less.

^ If you think the MRT is impressive, Parisien one is surely 10 times greater. You can get to every corner of Paris with its service.

^ A restaurant Vince took us to! We all felt guilty after the big lunch! The food was too great, especially the duck!

^ Palace of Versailles. Everything was closed when I was there. The place looks a lot greener and prettier in Summer so I heard.

^ Palace of Versailles.

^ La Défense. The business district of Paris.

^ The Eiffel Tower, what else.

^ The picture was taken before I saw the real snow. You can't really blame me, can you.

^ Montmartre, the romantic place to be for couples.

^ Now that's the real snow.

^ Place Pigalle. This is where all the prostitution takes place, you get the idea!

^ Cafe Des 2 Moulin. The cafe where Amélie works in the movie Amélie. It took us a really long time to find it, thanks to JJ. Such a good guide!

^ Moulin Rouge.

^ Vince's beer collection.

^ It was still snowing the morning we left Paris. Beautiful.

European Holiday Highlights 2 - Saint-Emilion & Biarritz

2009-03-12T00:33:00.016+08:00

Two of the places I fell in love with in France, they are absolutely beautiful.

^ The ruin in Saint-Emilion.

^ The place we visited where we got to do a 'brief' wine tasting.

^ The view of Saint-Emilion from the top of a building. For me, this is a dream town to live in.

^ JJ's artistic attempt which I find quite interesting :-)

^ Biarritz/Basque Country. Almost all the houses look the same in Biarritz. One of the reasons that makes this place so beautiful.

^ The solar clock.

^ Statue of Virgin Mary on the rock in Biarritz.

^ A house painted by the fans for a well-known rugby player.

^ The sea looks just like a layered cake :)

^ Our ultimate guide Robert. Special thanks to him as he took us around all day long from Biarritz to San Sebastian and got everything planned out so perfectly. Merci Robert!

These are the two places I'd highly recommend for anyone who plans to visit France. If you love nature, then you'd definitely enjoy them.

European Holiday Highlights 1 - Bordeaux

2009-03-11T16:28:00.018+08:00

As it is impossible to write all about my adventures in Europe, I'll do a series of highlights by pictures instead. First stop, Bordeaux.

^ First day in Bordeaux. Many vineyards along the way, beautfiful landscape.

^ Dinner at David's. The guys are totally addicted to Guitar Hero.

^ Rue Sainte-Catherine, the main shopping street in Bordeaux.

^ Lunch with Julien, the most famous guy in Bordeaux according to his friends. And I have no doubt about that.

^ One of the best things I discovered in Bordeaux, the Texane pizza. I swear pizza never tasted sooooo good! I refuse to give my suppport to any pizza chains anymore!

^ Gala Dentaire. I had so much fun that night, and I love French parties!

^ The Great Dune du Pyla. The largest sand dune in Europe. I nearly lost my breath walking up the dune, but the landscape was breathtaking!

^ One of the 'French' games we played. Alert, never fall asleep during French party!

^ Bordeaux Central. What a beautiful place.

^ Bordeaux Central

^ Bordeaux Central. The local tramway.

^ One of the few ruins in Bordeaux.

^ The fountain was not working in winter. I shall go back in summer!

^ The restaurant we went, the artist just came in to perform. The atmosphere was nice. Something you can't find in Singapore, for sure.

^ David's housewarming. I think this is what we miss in Singapore. You never really get to throw any party like this, what a shame. Cultural difference eh?

Just wanted to say I had a blast in Bordeaux. The people, landscape, food and pastries all make me want to go back NOW!

French – Forethoughts & Afterthoughts

2009-03-10T16:54:00.000+08:00

A few days before I flew to France, I had already planned the worst that’s going to happen during my one-month visit. The reason being -- I do not speak French. Call me a stereotype but I have heard million stories about how cold can French people get when you don’t speak their language.

Everything was negative until I stepped onto the Air France flight. I was seated next to two English speaking men, that was such a relief! I started talking to this old man next to me asking if I need to fill out any entry form to enter France. He suggested that I’d better approach the flight attendant. So I did. There came the flight attendant. ‘Bonjour.’ So I said. ‘Bonjour’, so he replied and started talking to me in French. I believe he asked if I could speak French so I immediately came up with ‘Je ne parle pas Francais’. He then smiled and the conversation switched over to English right away. He was kind enough to provide me all the information I needed. And on top of that, he got his colleague who was gonna go on the same connecting flight as I would take to Bordeaux to lead me the way through Charles de Gaulle airport as soon as we got off the flight. That was really nice of him. And at that moment I thought, French people aren’t that cold after all, are they?

During my stay in France, I met a lot of French people who do not speak English. I was lucky enough to have my friend as my translator or it would have been difficult for me. There were some downtimes too though. I must admit that it frustrated me a lot when people were conversing in French, which I absolutely had no idea of. I felt totally out of place. As much as I wanted to join the conversation, it was only limited as I do not speak French. I could only have myself to blame though, as I didn’t learn proper French before my departure to France.

I wasn’t really eager to learn French then as I thought it wouldn’t be much of a problem since I would only stay for a month. Oh boy I was totally wrong. It is the key if you want to meet new people. But I met some really nice people none the less. They can be really nice if you get to know them. So I’m determined to learn French this time around. I want to be able to speak the language when I visit next time as well as getting to know the people. La France, a bientot.

Intro

2009-03-08T14:28:00.001+08:00

The title may suggest that I'm new to blogging. In fact, I am not. I have been blogging for some years. The previous blog was all about random stuff though. But nevermind that, I just needed a place to rant. And now I've decided to start one about my life and travelling experiences instead.

As I just got back from France a couple of days back, I'm pretty much still suffering from jet-lag. I will start posting as soon as I get over the jet-lag as well as post-holiday blues!